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I have to run as fast as I can to a randomly selected other room.
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Invisible positive pregnancy test.
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Thermometer...goes where?!?!
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If we had thumbs, we would be snapping.
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It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.
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It took Ralph six minutes to realize the balloon wasn't going to come back.
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Get off the table! You're not my real mom!!!
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The awkward moment when you realize that the person you've been making fun of is right behind you...
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Oh hey, I ran 'em thru the scratchy tongue cycle. That cool?
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There is nothing quite so good as burial at sea. It is simple, tidy, and not very incriminating.
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Can't wait for annual reports to come out. My curiosity is killing me.
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Hilarious. Now let me back in.
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I got stuck so I went to sleep.
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Remember diet. Remember diet. Remember diet.
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Do not leave me! I can change...
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I may be schizophrenic...but at least I have each other.
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What am I doing with my lives?
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Don't sit on his lap now Carl, wait until he is wearing all black.
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Your sole is mine!
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I are Dunecat. I controls the spice, I controls the universe.
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The cat traps are working.
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Cow poop. Yes, I definitely stepped in cow poop. I hate nature.
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Mike soon regretted the day he swallowed a magnet.
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It's so shiny. I must murder it.
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New from Ikea, Crazy Cat Lady organizer.
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I love you lamp.
Shut up.
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Say nothing. They'll blame the dog.
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I need a new minion. Dis one is broken.
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They suspect nothing.
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For the love of God! Feed the damn cat.
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Can spot a bird from across the yard... Can't find the piece of meat you dropped unless you point it out 10 times.
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Food limit reached. Start sleep cycle.
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Like a boss.
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They steal his poop too? This is becoming an epidemic.
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If I just keep looking cute. They'll surely blame the dog.
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I can has prom date?
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Behold! I found my mittens!
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Don't do it Carl! You're on your 9th life!
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Evry dayz, 3 o clockz. Mebe one day I sez meow to her.
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Pull cord to begin apocalypse.
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And that's how the catdog was made.
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Lieutenant Dan! You got the new legs!
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Man's best friend... my worst enemy.
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Why don't you have a seat and explain where my Testicles went.
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One Direction
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That paranoid feeling you get when someone behind you laughs really loudly...
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I don't always do stupid mistakes, but when I do, I act like it never happened and lick myself.
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1 ring to rule them all!
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They told me to go back to healthcare.gov!
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I don't always chew on plastic bags but when I do, I make sure the bag is in your bedroom and you are sleeping
